To the beat of a different drum.

It has been ages since I posted.  Since march I have been either stupidly busy, fatigued or dealing with ill-health both related to my tumor or my immuno-suppression, and setting up new specialists.  I'm finally back to semi-regular posting with my fiction blog.  I'm finally sort-of settled into my new living situation.  I've been spending lot's of time with old friends, family and a pair of adorable doggies of whom I've been playing surrogate mother too.  Time really dose flow to it's own beat, as before I had even realized it, August had arrived.

I'm not a fan of August.  Too many bad things happen around August. Every year I wonder what will happen this time.  I'm hoping nothing because I've already had enough shit for one year.  The 25th is around the corner.  I've survived another year.  Not yet 30 and I'm marking off years of life with the same sense of achievement usually held by those over 70.

The 28th - anniversary of my first Grand Mal. Oct 2nd - Anniversary of my awake craniotomy. Oct 7 - Anniversary of a bitch-slap I never deserved from life or from someone I cared about and trusted. It would be nice if it ended there.  But life is not so kind.  Then there's March... When we will be wishing that one of our own was still here.

We never know how much time we have left.  There a things I no longer care about because I've learned there are things I'll never have. There are things I can't worry about because I can't affect the out come no matter what I do. Instead I choose to focus on what I can achieve, what I can do. Even when it seems insufficient to what life throws at me.

I'm still around, just down under. :p

31 of May. Less then a week left in Aussie country.  Eep, I have to face another flight. Gah. I may be safe to fly but the trip  over made me feel roouugh.

I need a how-to on how to get to sleep

My insomnia has gotten bad again.  I'm on anti-epileptics that should make me sleep like a log.  But I'm struggling to get to sleep at decent hours.  Then when I've finally been up long enough to cause exhaustion I need to sleep ridiculous spans to catch up.  I'm trying to force a structured routine to make my body tire naturally but so far no luck.  But then I only have just managed to start getting a little more activity in without risking seizures. Beginning to feel like by the time I'm full recovered from the first op the surgeons will be cutting in to resect the tumour again.  On the bright side, the tumor may just shift away from the section of my brain that controls the movement of my right leg.  So I may get to keep they movement of the limb.

Quiet times

I made a little mistake. I cut down on my painkillers. This by itself was fine. Unfortunately it got to the point I stopped taking them. Bad decision.

I haven't had a lot of desire to do much recently as a result. I have a semi-permanent headache and bad quality sleep most of the time.  Most normal people would take pain-killers, but not me. I am so used to having headaches that I just carry on.  It wasn't until I had a really bad migraine and was forced to take some that I realised just how much it was affecting me. Suddenly I had some much more desire to be active and Write.

Homemade orange tea

I've recently started to make my own teas, rather than buy dehydrated, over-processed bags from the shop. Fruit and herbs teas are made from the same ingredients as juices or soups. The major difference is that the pieces have been finely diced, dehydrated and had, in some cases, preservatives mixed in. The real irony is the same ingredients in the tea bag often get chucked out in the food waste bin.  For example, if you want orange tea all you need is orange rind.  Stick into in a small pan with water a sugar to taste and a few minutes later you have orange tea. Great part of a healthy diet as the rind has plenty of various vitamins and minerals that usually end up tossed.

Other suggestions for old rind

Candied - Boil to soften then roll in raw sugar

Addition to stir fries and salads.